1 00:00:15,140 --> 00:00:16,183 - Hi. 2 00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:23,690 Can you help me buy some tin, Lowie? 3 00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:28,946 Everyone thinks they know their history. 4 00:00:30,989 --> 00:00:32,449 Not as good as | 5 00:00:34,326 --> 00:00:37,996 | was there in '76. 6 00:00:40,916 --> 00:00:43,627 1776. 7 00:00:46,797 --> 00:00:49,424 You don't believe me, do you? [chuckles] 8 00:00:51,718 --> 00:00:52,844 | Of course it is. 9 00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:56,598 | he knew the best about them, 10 00:00:58,225 --> 00:00:59,309 Washington, 11 00:01:01,562 --> 00:01:02,563 Jefferson, 12 00:01:04,356 --> 00:01:05,357 Franklin, 13 00:01:06,441 --> 00:01:07,442 Worship. 14 00:01:08,860 --> 00:01:10,445 | he saw America 15 00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:11,905 be born. 16 00:01:15,242 --> 00:01:20,330 You know, I could tell you a few things about the revolution. 17 00:01:22,207 --> 00:01:23,208 What? 18 00:01:24,585 --> 00:01:25,877 Come with me. 19 00:01:27,462 --> 00:01:32,301 Look at this ocean these nice boats. 20 00:01:33,218 --> 00:01:37,139 If I look at them any longer, Then I'll vomit on myself. 21 00:01:37,681 --> 00:01:39,725 I've never hated the ocean. 22 00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:43,186 Oh God, my feet hurt. 23 00:01:45,063 --> 00:01:48,483 Historical textbooks provide only half of the knowledge. 24 00:01:50,027 --> 00:01:55,949 Washington,Jefferson, well, they were all great people. 25 00:01:58,368 --> 00:01:59,620 | I knew them all. 26 00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:06,877 We had a great time 27 00:02:08,170 --> 00:02:09,338 here in New England. 28 00:02:14,301 --> 00:02:17,054 Now look and listen. 29 00:02:18,930 --> 00:02:21,058 I'll tell you what really happened. 30 00:02:22,684 --> 00:02:28,106 | I can tell you everything about the true spirit of '76. 31 00:02:28,106 --> 00:03:21,159 [patriotic music] 32 00:03:37,551 --> 00:03:40,929 -Marta. Martha, come here. | I need to talk to you. 33 00:03:42,514 --> 00:03:43,640 -General Washington. 34 00:03:44,057 --> 00:03:46,309 It was wonderful to see you walking after last night. 35 00:03:46,309 --> 00:03:48,019 - Oh, it was nice, wasn't it? 36 00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:49,646 A new day has come. 37 00:03:49,646 --> 00:03:52,274 Listen, we still have some time, before we attack the British. 38 00:03:52,274 --> 00:03:53,358 How about a little... 39 00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:56,611 -George, | I don't have time for lying in the hay. 40 00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,488 Chickens need to be fed 41 00:03:58,989 --> 00:04:00,198 cows need to be milked, 42 00:04:00,907 --> 00:04:03,452 and | I have to make some tea for participants of the patchwork competition. 43 00:04:03,452 --> 00:04:05,495 -| I have a tic that's probably itchy. 44 00:04:06,204 --> 00:04:07,748 We won't argue, right? 45 00:04:08,582 --> 00:04:09,583 -Okay-- 46 00:04:09,875 --> 00:04:11,668 - Okay, okay. Well, that's settled. 47 00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:14,296 By the cherry tree in the orchard, five minutes. 48 00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:15,547 -Which cherry? 49 00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:17,382 -I'm glad you asked. 50 00:04:18,008 --> 00:04:22,637 Behind the vast sky, right next to the amber waves of grain, 51 00:04:22,804 --> 00:04:26,558 east of the majestic purple mountains and right on the fruit plains. 52 00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:28,018 You can't miss this. 53 00:04:32,481 --> 00:04:35,442 -Wars would be better winnings if they were played in bed. 54 00:05:03,094 --> 00:05:05,430 George? - Yes, my Martha. 55 00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:08,433 Marta, look, I found it cover of Time magazine. 56 00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:10,477 A bit of a celebrity, eh? 57 00:05:10,727 --> 00:05:11,394 Yes. 58 00:05:11,686 --> 00:05:12,687 Excellent. 59 00:05:13,563 --> 00:05:17,484 Listen George, I just have a moment, to devote myself to this stupidity. 60 00:05:18,235 --> 00:05:19,528 Let's get started That tic of yours, huh? 61 00:05:19,528 --> 00:05:21,154 -All right. 62 00:05:21,822 --> 00:05:25,242 It's time to take care about the needs of our country. 63 00:05:25,992 --> 00:05:27,828 [chuckles] 64 00:05:27,953 --> 00:05:28,954 Yes. 65 00:05:30,831 --> 00:05:36,753 [music] 66 00:05:36,753 --> 00:05:38,839 [bleating] 67 00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:42,884 [music] 68 00:07:11,139 --> 00:07:12,766 -Oh, George. 69 00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:17,228 [bleating] 70 00:07:17,228 --> 00:07:25,695 [music] 71 00:07:25,695 --> 00:07:30,951 [bleating] 72 00:07:31,201 --> 00:07:38,375 [music] 73 00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:23,933 What did I tell you? 74 00:11:26,227 --> 00:11:28,646 Wasn't George a hell of a guy? 75 00:11:30,148 --> 00:11:36,821 Well, come on, there are other people who you want to meet. 76 00:11:41,451 --> 00:11:43,077 Paul Revere. 77 00:11:43,328 --> 00:11:47,290 Now a real madman awaits you, driving through the city and waking up 78 00:11:47,582 --> 00:11:49,375 everyone and their brother up. 79 00:11:49,751 --> 00:11:53,129 [chuckles] But he was a damn good guy. 80 00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:54,964 Look at this figurine they gave him. 81 00:11:55,256 --> 00:11:56,591 Pretty nice, huh? 82 00:11:57,884 --> 00:12:01,095 Too bad it is 200 years of pigeon dung on it. 83 00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:04,849 He used to love drinking and fooling around. 84 00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:10,855 Well, here's a guy who loved your women anytime and anywhere. 85 00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:14,984 He had a signal that he hung up in the northern church 86 00:12:14,984 --> 00:12:18,863 tell his girlfriend where to meet him. [chuckles] 87 00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:22,492 One by land and two by sea. 88 00:12:23,534 --> 00:12:26,579 You'd think that's it warning against the British. 89 00:12:26,704 --> 00:12:27,830 Bullshit. 90 00:12:28,206 --> 00:12:33,378 It was a signal to his girlfriend, that she was to meet him in the forest or at the port. 91 00:12:33,378 --> 00:12:35,213 [laughter] 92 00:12:35,546 --> 00:12:38,716 - Hey, Paul Revere. You are no gentleman. 93 00:12:38,716 --> 00:12:41,928 You don't always try play with me, right? 94 00:12:42,637 --> 00:12:45,139 - Yes, because you have such beautiful buns. 95 00:12:45,139 --> 00:12:49,394 - Oh, Mr. Canyon, there's not much to see outside. 96 00:12:49,394 --> 00:12:52,981 - No, but I'm a connoisseur and I know how good rolls are when I see them, 97 00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:54,732 whether they are secret or not. 98 00:12:54,732 --> 00:12:58,569 -Oh, these beautiful forests. 99 00:12:58,736 --> 00:13:01,948 - It's pretty, isn't it? But not quite as pretty as you. 100 00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:06,869 [laughter] 101 00:13:07,245 --> 00:13:10,748 Walk over me so I can see your ass. 102 00:13:12,333 --> 00:13:14,127 -Oh, Paul. 103 00:13:20,383 --> 00:13:30,268 [music] [groans] 104 00:13:50,288 --> 00:13:52,457 -Oh, it was good, it was. 105 00:13:52,457 --> 00:13:56,294 -Oh, | I should say so. 106 00:13:57,128 --> 00:13:58,713 Oh. 107 00:13:58,963 --> 00:14:01,674 - I have some twigs in my briquettes. 108 00:14:02,216 --> 00:14:05,553 Let's go to my place and let's finish this. 109 00:14:05,553 --> 00:14:09,557 - Oh, I'd love to finish it with you. 110 00:14:09,557 --> 00:14:11,476 - It's just over the next hill. 111 00:14:12,727 --> 00:14:15,355 -Over the hill, as they say. 112 00:14:18,066 --> 00:14:20,401 [birds chirping] 113 00:14:25,114 --> 00:14:26,783 -Washington should accept us now. 114 00:14:26,908 --> 00:14:30,244 He probably went play redcoat, stupid. 115 00:14:31,204 --> 00:14:32,747 -Oh, | I don't know. 116 00:14:32,747 --> 00:14:34,082 | I think he's quite nice. 117 00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:38,294 His wooden teeth gave me splinters. 118 00:14:38,294 --> 00:14:40,213 -Splinters? I have to be careful. 119 00:14:40,463 --> 00:14:43,508 - Oh, don't be afraid. | it will do you good. 120 00:14:47,804 --> 00:14:49,347 -Let's not delay any longer. 121 00:14:49,514 --> 00:14:50,765 The evening becomes short. 122 00:14:51,474 --> 00:14:54,310 That fool John Hancock will come for a late dinner. 123 00:14:54,519 --> 00:14:56,979 -Oh, triangle. 124 00:14:56,979 --> 00:14:58,398 - Oh, you wouldn't like John. 125 00:14:58,481 --> 00:15:00,566 The only thing What sets him apart is his signature. 126 00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:02,443 -Oh, you're just jealous. 127 00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:03,611 -Never in my life. 128 00:15:03,694 --> 00:15:06,197 I am a greater man than any of them of these revolutionaries. 129 00:15:07,365 --> 00:15:08,866 - We'll see. 130 00:15:13,496 --> 00:15:16,707 [music] 131 00:15:35,226 --> 00:15:47,405 [groaning] [music] 132 00:17:24,919 --> 00:17:27,505 - Right there, right there. 133 00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:31,592 [music] 134 00:18:01,789 --> 00:18:03,416 -Do you like it? 135 00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:10,256 -Do you like it? -Does this give you pleasure? 136 00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:13,175 -Oh, are you feeling okay? I feel very good. 137 00:18:13,676 --> 00:18:15,219 Just don't stop. 138 00:18:32,403 --> 00:18:34,238 -Put it in your mouth. 139 00:18:34,488 --> 00:18:35,489 Oh. 140 00:18:40,202 --> 00:18:41,704 Oh, it feels good 141 00:18:45,625 --> 00:18:48,085 and right next to it, love. 142 00:18:49,086 --> 00:18:53,090 [bleating] 143 00:19:03,476 --> 00:19:04,810 Oh, that's good. 144 00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:17,782 Oh, you're the best. 145 00:19:18,032 --> 00:19:23,704 [bleating] 146 00:19:35,049 --> 00:19:36,926 Oh yes. 147 00:19:36,926 --> 00:19:38,386 Oh yes. 148 00:19:40,471 --> 00:19:47,561 [bleating] 149 00:19:47,561 --> 00:19:49,397 All the way. 150 00:19:55,778 --> 00:19:57,363 Oh, you're good. 151 00:19:58,864 --> 00:20:02,702 [bleating] 152 00:20:09,500 --> 00:20:19,427 [music] [groans] 153 00:21:38,255 --> 00:21:39,632 -Keep doing that. 154 00:21:39,632 --> 00:21:43,344 [bleating] 155 00:21:43,344 --> 00:21:45,012 -Oh, Paul. 156 00:21:45,012 --> 00:21:46,806 Oh, give it to me. 157 00:21:46,806 --> 00:21:53,521 [moaning intensely] 158 00:21:53,521 --> 00:21:55,815 Come on, make me happy. 159 00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:57,399 Harder, Dad. 160 00:21:57,399 --> 00:21:58,776 Harder, Dad. 161 00:21:59,693 --> 00:22:03,656 [bleating] 162 00:22:03,656 --> 00:22:06,283 -Let me hear you coming. 163 00:22:06,325 --> 00:22:08,869 -[moaning intensely] 164 00:22:08,869 --> 00:22:10,287 The British are coming. 165 00:22:10,329 --> 00:22:11,789 The British are coming. 166 00:22:12,915 --> 00:22:14,500 The British are coming. 167 00:22:14,500 --> 00:22:16,836 Oh, the British are coming. 168 00:22:16,836 --> 00:22:21,966 [moaning loudly] 169 00:22:21,966 --> 00:22:25,386 -Oh God, it's so good. 170 00:22:25,636 --> 00:22:29,181 [bleating] 171 00:22:29,431 --> 00:22:34,979 [bleating] 172 00:22:34,979 --> 00:22:36,939 [music stops] 173 00:22:36,939 --> 00:22:40,568 [bleating] 174 00:22:40,568 --> 00:22:42,278 -Amy. 175 00:22:47,908 --> 00:22:54,707 - Ah, Boston, birthplace Ben Franklin, inventor. 176 00:22:55,416 --> 00:22:56,917 He could come up with anything. 177 00:22:57,585 --> 00:23:00,963 This crazy guy went crazy flying kites. 178 00:23:01,338 --> 00:23:06,260 Well, we're at war and he is playing with himself. 179 00:23:06,260 --> 00:23:08,262 Degenerate bastard. 180 00:23:08,596 --> 00:23:12,766 [music] 181 00:23:56,644 --> 00:24:01,315 -[buzzing] 182 00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:08,530 Oh my God. 183 00:24:23,253 --> 00:24:24,463 -Sorry. 184 00:24:25,214 --> 00:24:28,092 Are you the very famous Dr. Ben Franklin? 185 00:24:29,802 --> 00:24:31,553 -Oh yes, indeed, | am. 186 00:24:32,221 --> 00:24:35,140 -Oh, dear sir, you have to help me. 187 00:24:36,725 --> 00:24:38,769 -What can I do for you, my child? 188 00:24:39,311 --> 00:24:41,146 -It's complicated. 189 00:24:42,106 --> 00:24:46,527 General Washington he told me that only you can solve my problem. 190 00:24:47,111 --> 00:24:49,279 -Really? Really? 191 00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:54,034 - He didn't just say you were actually there the best inventor in the colonies, 192 00:24:54,410 --> 00:24:56,787 but also his local rake. - Really? 193 00:24:57,037 --> 00:24:58,580 Oh, how nice. 194 00:24:59,081 --> 00:25:02,376 Well, tell me, my child, what can he do for you? 195 00:25:03,627 --> 00:25:06,088 -Well, it's me, cupcakes. 196 00:25:06,797 --> 00:25:09,049 -Your buns? -My buns. 197 00:25:09,049 --> 00:25:10,050 -[chuckles] 198 00:25:10,175 --> 00:25:14,096 Oh, well, my little girl, what's going on with your bun? 199 00:25:15,264 --> 00:25:22,146 -My lovers tried their best but they couldn't take my toast off. 200 00:25:22,146 --> 00:25:25,482 -You've come to the right person. 201 00:25:25,816 --> 00:25:26,942 -| to have? 202 00:25:26,942 --> 00:25:28,152 -Oh yes. 203 00:25:28,277 --> 00:25:29,653 Oh yes, of course. 204 00:25:29,653 --> 00:25:32,489 -So can you help me? 205 00:25:33,824 --> 00:25:36,243 - Yes, my newest invention. 206 00:25:36,243 --> 00:25:37,453 Hold my kite. 207 00:25:39,955 --> 00:25:41,457 Let's see, it must be here somewhere. 208 00:25:41,498 --> 00:25:45,085 | I know | I had this with me when | I came on my-- 209 00:25:45,085 --> 00:25:47,463 Let's see, maybe it's here in this pocket. 210 00:25:47,463 --> 00:25:49,298 [chuckles] 211 00:25:49,298 --> 00:25:51,925 Of course not, how stupid of me. 212 00:25:52,217 --> 00:25:54,720 Let's see, | maybe I put it here though. 213 00:25:55,012 --> 00:25:59,641 Oh no, it's an inebriated stomach, you know. 214 00:25:59,641 --> 00:26:02,728 Let's see now, | or I have it here somewhere. 215 00:26:02,728 --> 00:26:05,773 Oh, oh, oh, oh, let's see | I hope the cat didn't have it. 216 00:26:05,773 --> 00:26:07,274 Let's see somewhere. 217 00:26:07,399 --> 00:26:13,155 Oh yes, there it is, my child. [chuckles] 218 00:26:16,408 --> 00:26:19,286 Eat a small bite everything will be fine. 219 00:26:19,995 --> 00:26:23,665 - Tell me, good doctor, what do you have there? 220 00:26:25,459 --> 00:26:31,131 -This is cupcake filling. -That's interesting. 221 00:26:31,548 --> 00:26:32,549 What do they do about it? 222 00:26:33,217 --> 00:26:38,347 -| put it in an omelette, inside and out, inside and out. 223 00:26:38,639 --> 00:26:42,351 -Truth be told, Dr. Franklin, | This seems strange to me. 224 00:26:44,019 --> 00:26:46,063 - Well, I'll show you. 225 00:26:46,063 --> 00:26:51,151 Lift up your skirt. Oh my, my, what beautiful legs. 226 00:26:53,278 --> 00:26:54,780 Oh my, what a pretty beaver. 227 00:26:55,114 --> 00:26:57,699 | I think we will one day including the symbol of Oregon. 228 00:26:57,699 --> 00:27:01,411 Now he's going around in circles this little cupcake filler, 229 00:27:01,411 --> 00:27:06,458 over and over and over. Oh my God, my God. 230 00:27:06,708 --> 00:27:09,837 Now we wind the kite string. 231 00:27:09,837 --> 00:27:14,007 Let's see, here it is, wrapping around around a small cupcake filler. 232 00:27:14,007 --> 00:27:17,594 [explosion] 233 00:27:17,594 --> 00:27:18,846 -You see. 234 00:27:19,304 --> 00:27:24,810 [buzzing sound] 235 00:27:24,810 --> 00:27:26,311 -Let's get started. 236 00:27:28,939 --> 00:27:30,232 [bleating] 237 00:27:30,482 --> 00:27:32,025 [buzzing sound] 238 00:27:50,544 --> 00:27:52,421 [bleating] 239 00:27:58,010 --> 00:28:00,554 [music] [groans] 240 00:28:33,045 --> 00:28:34,755 -Oh my. 241 00:28:36,048 --> 00:28:38,300 -All right. -Oh, so firm. 242 00:28:38,300 --> 00:28:41,261 [groans] Oh, honey. 243 00:28:41,261 --> 00:28:43,138 -Oh, Dr. Franklin. 244 00:28:43,388 --> 00:28:46,600 [groaning] [kissing] 245 00:29:04,701 --> 00:29:07,329 [bleating] 246 00:29:14,795 --> 00:29:17,381 [music] 247 00:29:17,381 --> 00:29:19,091 [bleating] 248 00:29:19,341 --> 00:29:21,301 [music] 249 00:29:45,784 --> 00:29:47,828 [kissing] [groaning] 250 00:29:49,621 --> 00:29:59,256 [music] [groans] 251 00:32:27,529 --> 00:32:29,823 -Suck it. Oh yes. 252 00:32:30,073 --> 00:32:34,995 [bleating] 253 00:32:50,469 --> 00:32:55,515 [groans get louder] 254 00:33:00,645 --> 00:33:10,614 [music] 255 00:33:49,277 --> 00:33:52,739 - Oh, I'm in the water again. 256 00:33:52,739 --> 00:33:53,740 God. 257 00:33:53,740 --> 00:33:57,994 If I throw up again for a T-shirt, well. 258 00:33:58,203 --> 00:34:03,875 My grandfather used to hang around here with a guy named John Garbanzo. 259 00:34:04,334 --> 00:34:08,964 You know him as John Smith, as well as the local Holiday Inn. 260 00:34:09,214 --> 00:34:11,633 He often cheated on his wife. 261 00:34:12,008 --> 00:34:13,677 Jan Kowalski, 262 00:34:14,302 --> 00:34:16,471 Can you believe that fucking name? 263 00:34:16,805 --> 00:34:20,642 And here's a guy who really he was interested in Indian women. 264 00:34:20,642 --> 00:34:23,979 [music] 265 00:34:24,229 --> 00:34:27,816 One day he was driving through the forest with a half-hard horse, 266 00:34:28,024 --> 00:34:32,737 he was looking for a place to put it, when he noticed a big set of tits 267 00:34:32,988 --> 00:34:34,698 riding through the forest. 268 00:34:35,490 --> 00:34:40,036 He wanted his women they were just like his coffee – hot and black. 269 00:34:40,036 --> 00:34:42,497 Degenerate bastard. 270 00:34:42,747 --> 00:34:48,587 [music] 271 00:35:04,311 --> 00:35:07,480 [music] -I, Captain John Smith. 272 00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:08,398 You? 273 00:35:08,398 --> 00:35:09,899 -Pocahontas. 274 00:35:13,361 --> 00:35:16,823 -Boy, you have great tits. 275 00:35:18,617 --> 00:35:20,619 I'd give a year's salary to have sex. 276 00:35:21,453 --> 00:35:24,205 -Now you're talking like this bullshit I want to hear, man. 277 00:35:24,205 --> 00:35:25,206 -What are you saying? 278 00:35:25,457 --> 00:35:27,459 -You know what I'm talking about you junkie. 279 00:35:27,459 --> 00:35:29,919 | I don't mean pasta with blueberry sauce. 280 00:35:30,503 --> 00:35:31,838 Want to take crack with you? 281 00:35:32,047 --> 00:35:33,882 Get me some loot, zoot suit. 282 00:35:34,257 --> 00:35:36,009 - Every word I said was understood. 283 00:35:36,092 --> 00:35:37,677 -Every syllable. 284 00:35:37,886 --> 00:35:41,056 -Are you sure you are Indian? -Hey, don't cheat on me. 285 00:35:41,056 --> 00:35:43,058 I'm a Manhattan Indian from 42nd Street. 286 00:35:43,058 --> 00:35:44,267 -[groans] 287 00:35:45,310 --> 00:35:46,853 - Hey, wait a minute. 288 00:35:46,853 --> 00:35:48,521 First we need to talk a little about business. 289 00:35:48,730 --> 00:35:50,940 -Whatever. Just anything. 290 00:35:50,940 --> 00:35:54,694 [groans] 291 00:35:54,944 --> 00:35:59,616 [music] 292 00:36:28,144 --> 00:36:35,026 [bleating] 293 00:37:31,833 --> 00:37:38,214 [bleating] 294 00:38:26,095 --> 00:38:34,437 [bleating] 295 00:40:09,282 --> 00:40:15,538 [music] [groans] 296 00:40:52,951 --> 00:40:56,329 -[groaning] 297 00:41:05,046 --> 00:41:08,341 God, my hemorrhoids are killing me. 298 00:41:12,595 --> 00:41:16,474 If you have hemorrhoids as long as you have them, 299 00:41:17,517 --> 00:41:20,812 you would know how this is very annoying. 300 00:41:23,314 --> 00:41:24,649 [groaning] 301 00:41:26,109 --> 00:41:28,736 Oh, look there. 302 00:41:29,821 --> 00:41:35,243 Well, population hasn't changed since I was a child. 303 00:41:35,743 --> 00:41:38,287 [chuckles] That's weird. 304 00:41:39,247 --> 00:41:41,791 Well, come on. 305 00:41:42,208 --> 00:41:47,046 This is the bridge that the Minutemen use they were passing by to meet their girlfriends. 306 00:41:48,006 --> 00:41:51,426 You know, I knew three of them personally. 307 00:41:51,926 --> 00:41:56,222 The one in that famous photo that you all saw. 308 00:41:56,848 --> 00:41:59,267 They were fun-loving people. 309 00:41:59,767 --> 00:42:02,270 Always willing to have fun. 310 00:42:03,604 --> 00:42:08,067 You've probably all wondered where the name Minutemen came from. 311 00:42:08,818 --> 00:42:10,903 Well, let me show you. 312 00:42:10,903 --> 00:42:14,532 - It's quite nice here today. - Oh, it's a nice day, isn't it? 313 00:42:14,532 --> 00:42:16,701 - Why don't you leave it, buddy? 314 00:42:16,701 --> 00:42:17,785 [laughter] 315 00:42:17,785 --> 00:42:19,203 - Good job, good job. 316 00:42:19,203 --> 00:42:26,252 [crosstalk] 317 00:42:27,253 --> 00:42:30,298 -What are you saying? Want to hear something? Want to hear something? 318 00:42:30,298 --> 00:42:33,092 Short song | learned on the street. -Play. 319 00:42:33,092 --> 00:42:34,802 [music] 320 00:42:34,802 --> 00:42:37,388 - Do you want to dance? Oh, good. 321 00:42:37,638 --> 00:42:42,560 [music] 322 00:43:04,123 --> 00:43:05,166 -Did you hear any noise? 323 00:43:05,708 --> 00:43:10,630 [music] 324 00:43:15,259 --> 00:43:16,469 -What's going on? 325 00:43:17,261 --> 00:43:18,471 -They're soldiers. 326 00:43:19,263 --> 00:43:22,058 - Oh ho, that's exactly what we need. 327 00:43:22,058 --> 00:43:23,059 Hi. 328 00:43:23,059 --> 00:43:28,981 [music] 329 00:43:28,981 --> 00:43:30,024 -Hello. 330 00:43:30,691 --> 00:43:34,028 You are very handsome boys. 331 00:43:34,403 --> 00:43:35,863 -They don't look bad themselves. 332 00:43:36,239 --> 00:43:37,365 - Come here. 333 00:43:37,365 --> 00:43:38,783 Don't be shy. 334 00:43:39,492 --> 00:43:42,120 [crosstalk] 335 00:43:42,370 --> 00:43:43,663 -| I want it in red. 336 00:43:43,663 --> 00:43:45,373 -Oh, yes, quite, quite, yes. 337 00:43:46,082 --> 00:43:47,542 Hi. - Hi. 338 00:43:47,792 --> 00:43:49,252 - Hi. -| say there... 339 00:43:49,502 --> 00:43:54,257 -Well, how about this, young ladies? Come and drink beer with us, 340 00:43:54,423 --> 00:43:55,925 fighting boys? 341 00:43:56,300 --> 00:43:57,635 -Fighting boys, fuck you. 342 00:43:57,635 --> 00:43:59,720 The only fight you have is to fight with yourself. 343 00:43:59,720 --> 00:44:02,181 - Oh, nonsense, nonsense. 344 00:44:02,473 --> 00:44:06,102 Girls, guys, you missed a lot fun, right? 345 00:44:06,477 --> 00:44:09,021 It's been a long time since you last met studs like us. 346 00:44:10,898 --> 00:44:13,609 - Hey, soldier, | I like your style. 347 00:44:14,026 --> 00:44:17,697 How about we meet above an old barn on the edge of town? 348 00:44:18,030 --> 00:44:19,907 - Hey, don't waste it there's your time, brother. 349 00:44:19,991 --> 00:44:22,034 These girls will set us up. 350 00:44:22,618 --> 00:44:25,037 -Zeb, let's go let's go to their cat house and get some sleep 351 00:44:25,037 --> 00:44:26,372 those witches there. 352 00:44:26,372 --> 00:44:29,083 What do you say, huh? - Hey, hey. Wait, boy. 353 00:44:29,792 --> 00:44:32,420 Zeb has business to attend to. 354 00:44:33,296 --> 00:44:39,510 Well, let's say it will be around 9:00. 355 00:44:39,760 --> 00:44:42,471 -What's the address? -Hey, what is this? 356 00:44:44,974 --> 00:44:49,187 -Just my Pulsar digital hourglass. 357 00:44:50,438 --> 00:44:54,525 My father bought it for me at Cartiers of Mercantile. 358 00:44:54,525 --> 00:44:56,652 [laughter] 359 00:44:56,903 --> 00:44:57,653 -Right. 360 00:44:57,904 --> 00:44:59,530 [laughter] 361 00:44:59,780 --> 00:45:01,490 -It's very fashionable. 362 00:45:01,782 --> 00:45:04,076 Don't worry about the address. 363 00:45:04,452 --> 00:45:07,872 You boys are horny enough to sniff us out. 364 00:45:08,915 --> 00:45:10,541 See you around 9:00. 365 00:45:10,541 --> 00:45:11,626 [whistles] - [chuckles] 366 00:45:11,626 --> 00:45:12,752 -[screams] 367 00:45:12,752 --> 00:45:14,337 -You're right. 368 00:45:14,337 --> 00:45:15,546 -[chuckles] Dogs. 369 00:45:15,546 --> 00:45:16,839 - Come on, guys. 370 00:45:16,839 --> 00:45:18,132 [cheering] 371 00:45:18,382 --> 00:45:22,595 [music] 372 00:45:42,406 --> 00:45:43,407 - Don't worry, Missy. 373 00:45:43,407 --> 00:45:45,243 Your sister knows what she's doing. 374 00:45:46,702 --> 00:45:47,495 -| I don't know. 375 00:45:47,495 --> 00:45:50,373 Mom always said you were the crazy one and I think she was right. 376 00:45:50,831 --> 00:45:52,792 -Well, if you're going to be like that prude, then you can go there 377 00:45:52,792 --> 00:45:55,670 in the corner and watch. - What to observe? 378 00:45:56,128 --> 00:46:00,091 -| I can face all three guys and still have enough strength 379 00:46:00,091 --> 00:46:01,801 for the Continental Army. 380 00:46:02,051 --> 00:46:03,719 -God, you're vulgar. 381 00:46:04,178 --> 00:46:06,264 -You really are sweet creature, right? 382 00:46:06,430 --> 00:46:08,933 When was the last time someone came in? in your panties? 383 00:46:09,600 --> 00:46:10,935 -What does that mean? 384 00:46:42,717 --> 00:46:53,102 [music] 385 00:47:48,866 --> 00:47:52,953 It was a very long day. 386 00:47:54,121 --> 00:47:57,458 Why end up on a long road? 387 00:47:58,042 --> 00:48:14,642 Let's stay up all night and let's watch the stars. 388 00:48:51,720 --> 00:48:55,641 It was a very long day. 389 00:48:56,892 --> 00:49:00,604 Why end up on a long road? 390 00:49:00,604 --> 00:49:14,118 Let's stay up all night and let's watch the stars. 391 00:49:14,368 --> 00:49:25,796 [music] 392 00:50:05,628 --> 00:50:09,298 [music] It was a very long day. 393 00:50:10,508 --> 00:50:14,136 Why end up on a long road? 394 00:50:14,136 --> 00:50:30,402 Let's stay up all night and let's watch the stars. 395 00:50:30,653 --> 00:50:37,826 [music] 396 00:51:20,411 --> 00:51:23,247 - Hey, what's going on here? 397 00:51:23,497 --> 00:51:25,791 - Come on, it's already 9:00. 398 00:51:25,791 --> 00:51:27,084 -We are here. 399 00:51:27,418 --> 00:51:28,419 I invite you inside. 400 00:51:29,003 --> 00:51:30,546 -Okay, come on. 401 00:51:30,546 --> 00:51:32,506 -Of course, if you think you can do it? 402 00:51:32,673 --> 00:51:34,883 - Oh. - I think we can do it, honey. 403 00:51:35,259 --> 00:51:36,719 Don't worry about that. 404 00:51:37,595 --> 00:51:40,389 [cries of joy] [chuckle] 405 00:51:40,931 --> 00:51:42,891 -I just wanted to let you know I'm going first. 406 00:51:45,394 --> 00:51:48,522 [cackles] [whistling] 407 00:51:50,232 --> 00:51:51,358 -God. 408 00:51:51,358 --> 00:51:52,484 Check it out. 409 00:51:53,861 --> 00:51:56,614 - It's been too long, girls. 410 00:51:57,072 --> 00:51:59,158 -They probably couldn't live without us. 411 00:51:59,158 --> 00:52:00,409 -Normal. 412 00:52:00,409 --> 00:52:02,745 -Your dicks have already arrived. 413 00:52:03,078 --> 00:52:05,039 -Is that all, you three? 414 00:52:06,332 --> 00:52:08,626 It won't take long you can wait there. 415 00:52:09,001 --> 00:52:12,087 -Damn, this is the best sex I've ever had girl. 416 00:52:12,087 --> 00:52:13,714 -Oh, let her go, brother. 417 00:52:14,048 --> 00:52:15,674 We can fuck this here. 418 00:52:16,216 --> 00:52:18,218 -Right, a hole is a hole 419 00:52:18,218 --> 00:52:20,888 is a hole is a hole. -[chuckles] Come here, lassie. 420 00:52:21,138 --> 00:52:23,724 I'd like to dip my stick a wee bit. 421 00:52:24,433 --> 00:52:26,769 -You're a sweet talking bastard, aren't you? 422 00:52:27,269 --> 00:52:31,106 Well, gentleman, what'll it be, one at a time or all together? 423 00:52:31,482 --> 00:52:37,112 -Well, wench, your sister takes notes, now we'll see if you can take on the lot. 424 00:52:37,446 --> 00:52:42,534 -Right, and if she can't, there's a cat house right around the corner. 425 00:52:42,534 --> 00:52:44,286 [cackling] 426 00:52:44,286 --> 00:52:45,621 -You've got some nerve. 427 00:52:47,831 --> 00:52:49,708 -That just looks like it's Christmas. 428 00:52:51,835 --> 00:52:54,380 [groaning] 429 00:52:55,297 --> 00:52:56,423 [music] 430 00:52:56,423 --> 00:53:00,344 Whoa-ho, bring us some ladies 431 00:53:00,344 --> 00:53:04,139 there's not much time until dawn. 432 00:53:04,181 --> 00:53:08,143 Bring them, let's not waste a moment 433 00:53:08,185 --> 00:53:11,522 tonight is the night to have fun. 434 00:53:12,272 --> 00:53:16,235 Drink, drink, forget all our sorrows 435 00:53:16,235 --> 00:53:19,321 Who knows what the battle will bring? 436 00:53:20,280 --> 00:53:24,159 Drink, drink, let's burn all our bridges. 437 00:53:24,201 --> 00:53:27,746 Let's raise us our spirits and sing. 438 00:54:32,478 --> 00:54:36,356 Whoa-ho, bring on the wenches 439 00:54:36,356 --> 00:54:39,735 bring on the rum and the ale. 440 00:54:40,569 --> 00:54:44,531 Whoa-ho, bring on the wenches 441 00:54:44,531 --> 00:54:47,993 tomorrow we fight in the Dale. 442 00:54:48,744 --> 00:54:52,748 Whoa-ho, bring us some ladies 443 00:54:52,748 --> 00:54:55,918 there's not much time until dawn. 444 00:54:56,835 --> 00:55:00,380 Drink up, let's not waste a moment 445 00:55:00,380 --> 00:55:04,051 tonight is the night to have fun 446 00:55:05,010 --> 00:55:08,972 Drink, drink, forget all our sorrows 447 00:55:08,972 --> 00:55:13,018 Who knows what the battle will bring 448 00:55:13,018 --> 00:55:16,814 Drink, drink, let's burn all our bridges 449 00:55:16,814 --> 00:55:20,275 Let's raise up our spirits and sing 450 00:56:11,618 --> 00:56:16,748 [moaning] 451 00:56:25,132 --> 00:56:29,136 Oh, oh, bring all the wenches 452 00:56:29,136 --> 00:56:32,431 Bring all the rum and the ale 453 00:56:33,265 --> 00:56:37,185 Oh, oh, bring all the wenches 454 00:56:37,185 --> 00:56:40,689 Tomorrow we fight in the Dale 455 00:56:41,148 --> 00:56:45,152 Drink, drink, forget all our sorrows 456 00:56:45,152 --> 00:56:49,072 Who knows what the battle will bring 457 00:56:49,072 --> 00:56:53,076 Drink, drink, let's burn all our bridges 458 00:56:53,076 --> 00:56:55,871 Let's raise up our spirits and sing 459 00:56:55,871 --> 00:56:56,997 Ho-ho 460 00:56:56,997 --> 00:57:00,459 -George Washington, you think you got troubles? 461 00:57:00,667 --> 00:57:04,212 This poor devil was married to a real schizo, 462 00:57:04,588 --> 00:57:06,340 degenerate bastard. 463 00:57:11,094 --> 00:57:14,473 -Martha, is there any ale in the cupboard? 464 00:57:15,390 --> 00:57:16,391 -Ale? 465 00:57:17,225 --> 00:57:18,226 Cupboard? 466 00:57:18,560 --> 00:57:20,103 Who pray tell is Martha? 467 00:57:20,395 --> 00:57:21,396 I'm Betsy. 468 00:57:21,647 --> 00:57:23,982 Betsy Ross, the seamstress with the mostest. 469 00:57:23,982 --> 00:57:26,234 -Oh, Martha, really? 470 00:57:26,234 --> 00:57:29,363 Do we have to go through this Betsy Ross thing again? 471 00:57:29,821 --> 00:57:31,990 You remember what Dr. Tucker told you. 472 00:57:32,741 --> 00:57:36,954 He said, "Martha, you are not Betsy Ross. 473 00:57:37,579 --> 00:57:38,997 You're Martha Washington." 474 00:57:39,539 --> 00:57:41,333 Now, look, you've got to stop this. 475 00:57:41,333 --> 00:57:43,502 You're driving your old man fritters. 476 00:57:43,919 --> 00:57:45,128 -Dr. Tucker? 477 00:57:45,754 --> 00:57:47,047 Who be Dr. Tucker? 478 00:57:49,216 --> 00:57:50,884 -Forget it. Forget it. 479 00:57:52,302 --> 00:57:53,720 What sow thee there? 480 00:57:53,720 --> 00:57:54,972 -| sowest a flag, 481 00:57:56,139 --> 00:57:57,766 is it not beautiful? 482 00:57:58,892 --> 00:58:00,227 Do you not like it? 483 00:58:00,477 --> 00:58:02,396 | don't know whether to wear it or to wave it. 484 00:58:03,188 --> 00:58:08,819 -Look, let's forget about the flag, Betsy, | mean, Martha. 485 00:58:09,903 --> 00:58:14,616 Look, I've got something else I'd like to raise to full mast. 486 00:58:15,367 --> 00:58:17,119 -Do you never get enough? 487 00:58:18,161 --> 00:58:19,204 What about the British? 488 00:58:19,663 --> 00:58:22,207 -Screw the British, let them get their own wenches. 489 00:58:23,041 --> 00:58:24,459 -Well, then what about Martha? 490 00:58:24,876 --> 00:58:26,086 Will she not be pissed at thee? 491 00:58:27,462 --> 00:58:29,256 -If you won't tell her, | won't. 492 00:58:30,173 --> 00:58:32,759 -God. George, you are a clever lad. 493 00:58:33,969 --> 00:58:36,471 With all those children running around looking like you, 494 00:58:36,471 --> 00:58:38,890 you're a cinch to be named Father of our Country. 495 00:58:39,725 --> 00:58:42,144 -| know how to buck some lass, Betsy. 496 00:58:44,813 --> 00:58:48,859 Oh, but we must not tarry, I've got to be down to the Delaware this evening. 497 00:58:49,443 --> 00:58:52,362 If | don't leave soon, they won't leave a seat for me. 498 00:58:52,988 --> 00:58:53,989 -Wow. 499 00:58:54,156 --> 00:58:56,616 We should make haste then and not waste these precious moments. 500 00:59:11,840 --> 00:59:13,133 [moans] 501 00:59:13,383 --> 00:59:18,638 [music] [moaning] 502 01:00:21,368 --> 01:00:22,702 -Let's see if we can pigeonhole that. 503 01:00:22,702 --> 01:00:29,417 [moaning] 504 01:00:48,145 --> 01:00:49,104 -ls that the way you like it? 505 01:00:49,354 --> 01:00:50,230 -Love it. -Oh, yes. 506 01:00:50,230 --> 01:00:51,398 -Oh, yes. 507 01:00:51,398 --> 01:00:52,774 -That's what they all say. 508 01:00:57,946 --> 01:00:59,614 Talk dirty to me, Martha. 509 01:00:59,865 --> 01:01:02,617 [moans] 510 01:01:02,617 --> 01:01:05,704 Oh, Betsy. Oh, oh, Martha. 511 01:01:05,704 --> 01:01:07,789 Oh, oh, Betsy, | mean, Martha. 512 01:01:07,789 --> 01:01:09,708 Oh, oh, Betsy. 513 01:01:10,083 --> 01:01:11,209 How the hell? 514 01:01:11,751 --> 01:01:12,752 Oh. 515 01:01:14,087 --> 01:01:16,464 [music] 516 01:01:27,934 --> 01:01:33,940 [moaning] 517 01:02:06,681 --> 01:02:09,351 -This here is my ex-wife. 518 01:02:10,143 --> 01:02:12,020 | really love that one. 519 01:02:12,312 --> 01:02:13,980 Degenerate bastard. 520 01:02:14,648 --> 01:02:17,234 Over there sits my ex-wife too, 521 01:02:18,485 --> 01:02:20,403 she died of the consumption. 522 01:02:21,696 --> 01:02:26,117 That ex-wife died when | caught her in bed with Paul Revere. 523 01:02:26,451 --> 01:02:28,245 Degenerate bastard. 524 01:02:28,703 --> 01:02:30,538 This here is my ex-wife. 525 01:02:31,539 --> 01:02:34,542 Boy, could she-- Well, that's another story. 526 01:02:35,085 --> 01:02:36,544 Degenerate bastard. 527 01:02:37,045 --> 01:02:38,964 This here is my ex-wife. 528 01:02:39,422 --> 01:02:42,300 Oh, what | remember about her. 529 01:02:42,676 --> 01:02:44,386 Degenerate prevert. 530 01:02:44,636 --> 01:02:46,554 There's my cousin, Timmy, 531 01:02:47,555 --> 01:02:49,933 he liked small boys. 532 01:02:50,725 --> 01:02:52,269 We had to shoot him. 533 01:02:52,560 --> 01:02:54,521 Degenerate bastard. 534 01:02:55,063 --> 01:02:58,566 Right over there is my brother, Tom. 535 01:02:58,984 --> 01:03:05,323 Tom broke a leg at the age of 103 leaping out of a second-story window. 536 01:03:05,532 --> 01:03:07,284 Degenerate bastard. 537 01:03:08,660 --> 01:03:14,249 [music.] 538 01:04:18,104 --> 01:04:21,316 [music] 539 01:04:24,652 --> 01:04:25,737 -Yes, 540 01:04:27,697 --> 01:04:31,284 that's the way it was, 200 years ago 541 01:04:32,827 --> 01:04:34,329 just before it 542 01:04:36,206 --> 01:04:37,665 all turned to shit. 543 01:04:40,210 --> 01:04:41,211 Yes. 544 01:04:47,133 --> 01:05:21,876 [music]